The past few months have been a trying time. I entered unemployment with no warning and little confidence. It's been a long and tough winter, especially since I was ready to quit that job anyways.
Still, it took me 3 months to gather up the pieces and get my confidence back. The last month has been amazing. Becoming completely in-step with who you are is so important. Why fake an interview when you can be completely yourself and at ease? I'm tired of trying to hide my past or parts of me to conform to whatever job I am applying for. This idea of doing whatever it takes to join the ranks is gone for me. I am a different person, a bit quirky, unique, but I am interesting, fluent with people of all types, and I truly care. Confidence isn't some kind of concrete thing that requires wearing a suit or acting a certain way, it's knowing yourself in and out, and deciding to be that person that you are. It's being present and not allowing the past to bog you down.
I interviewed for my dream job a month into unemployment and completely botched it, almost every aspect of it. I felt phony too, to the point where I downplayed all of my skills, experience, online presence, and personality. Now, it's different.
I ran in Rock Creek Park today, nothing but shoes and a pair of shorts, blazing up trails and down the sides of hills. I came to a bridge overlooking the rushing water with giant boulders strewn about. Seventy degrees, perfectly blue skies, sun on my skin. I meditated for a while. Ephemeral thoughts trickled in and out of my skull as the water cascaded and pooled.
I'm uncertain of the future. But I am happy. And I've been happy. I know what I want, and I am leading myself there, slowly, and surely.
Still, it took me 3 months to gather up the pieces and get my confidence back. The last month has been amazing. Becoming completely in-step with who you are is so important. Why fake an interview when you can be completely yourself and at ease? I'm tired of trying to hide my past or parts of me to conform to whatever job I am applying for. This idea of doing whatever it takes to join the ranks is gone for me. I am a different person, a bit quirky, unique, but I am interesting, fluent with people of all types, and I truly care. Confidence isn't some kind of concrete thing that requires wearing a suit or acting a certain way, it's knowing yourself in and out, and deciding to be that person that you are. It's being present and not allowing the past to bog you down.
I interviewed for my dream job a month into unemployment and completely botched it, almost every aspect of it. I felt phony too, to the point where I downplayed all of my skills, experience, online presence, and personality. Now, it's different.
I ran in Rock Creek Park today, nothing but shoes and a pair of shorts, blazing up trails and down the sides of hills. I came to a bridge overlooking the rushing water with giant boulders strewn about. Seventy degrees, perfectly blue skies, sun on my skin. I meditated for a while. Ephemeral thoughts trickled in and out of my skull as the water cascaded and pooled.
I'm uncertain of the future. But I am happy. And I've been happy. I know what I want, and I am leading myself there, slowly, and surely.
2013
