Tuesday, February 16, 2010

dear mom, i hope you never read this

i have a really hard cock with great manners
i know what you are thinking
like, 'no that can not be so, that is sort of an oxymoron'
i really have a really hard cock with really great manners
you should see him at cock-tail parties
cock-tail parties are his forte
'would you please pour me a palate-cleansing spot of port my dear man'
'the tiramazu is a gustatory delight, you are a true artisan'
he always stands when a lady enters or exits too
he is always clean, and keeps himself well-groomed
GQ magazine says "it's all about the details when dressing to impress"
he is the envy of GQ
when he is one on one with a lady
he never makes an appearance too soon or too late
he is always right on time 
he swears:
'coming late is rude and coming too early is not respectable for a gentleman of of my stature'
my really hard cock is all about making sure people enjoy themselves
he is selfless, though he delights in the pleasure of others
if he makes a mess, he always cleans up after himself
and if he is out when the weather gets wet, he fashionably dons a rain-jacket
Esquire magazine has a list of "things men should be able to do"
he is the paradigm of the "Esquire man"
ladies always compliment him
i am glad to have a really hard cock with great manners
thank you