Wednesday, January 19, 2011

THE ROMANTIC by Poncho Peligroso

This evening I decided to sit-down with Poncho Peligroso's foray into soon-to-be-published poetry, The Romantic.

Didn't quite know what to expect of this guy. I only recently became aware of his online presence and haven't really had the motivation to thoroughly check him out. I requested to read through his new poetry book, The Romantic, so I could properly get a feel for what he was all about, and also (self-interestedly) see how a peer is going about 'getting his shit out there.' He kindly and quickly forwarded it to me. This, I admire.

Poncho subjected me (as the reader) to an onslaught of his innermost thoughts, desires, and experiences. If you read this blog, you are probably aware I haven't cried in an unfortunately inordinate amount of time, but some of these poems pulled on me, in completely unexpected manners. It is a beautiful feeling to read someone else's thoughts and completely identify with them or to feel yourself being moved in a way that you had not expected. Ah! This is why writing is such a grand thing, and conversely, reading another human's writing is the greatest insight into their mind and experiences. We all identify personally with different aspects of people's writing, depending on our experiences, but it is generally accepted that any empathetic human can relate to another's plight if they are willing (which, one could argue, requires radical open-mindedness, but that's a philosophy paper I wrote years ago and not really pertinent to this review, eh?).

Things to look forward to reading about: love/loss, assholes (figuratively), other people, self-reflection, existence, dongs, family, other things.

A poem I found especially relevant was "it doesn't take much," a 'love lost' themed poem that is ridiculously short and sweet for the power it conveys, additionally, it involved facebook. The simplicity of it and the emotion I was left feeling seemed to be skewed, but, it was real, and it was really fucking good.

The title of his poetry collection is also the title of the poem which included this gem of a line:

"i think you’re very pretty and want to kiss you//but i don’t want to impose my will on another human being"

After countless pages of writing, days of thought, and late conversations with good people, Poncho sums up everything I have felt in the past two years when in proximity to an attractive person that reciprocates my feelings -- in two lines. He's insightful and damn, Mister Peligroso might be a feminist's dream boy...

Poncho is reminiscent of many of his contemporaries but also extremely fresh. This isn't 'just another' Tao Lin'atator. His style is extremely effective, dripping in self-reflection and self-awareness and nestled neatly into free verse/free form poetry. I made some short notes while reading, simply marking page numbers and random thoughts. Here are a few of the key words festooned throughout my scratchwork: "fucked up, fuckbroYES, lol'd, grimaced, recoiled, grotesque, fucking rip my heart out, wow real talk, damn, wtf." ...which gives you insight into my literary and analytical capabilities but also his effect on my self.

Perhaps the most illuminating/introspective poem in The Romantic (though all of the poems are introspective in nature, I found this to be 'the most' illuminating) was titled "why am i writing all this goddamned poetry" which included the lines:

"damn it dad//why you gotta make me have no real problems//and be a really good role model//and allow me to pursue my passion// without forcing me to do things you want me to//so that you can live vicariously through me//like some dads do (i am told (by movies/tv))//damn it dad//damn it dad why you gotta play me like that//thanks"

To sum it up, buy Poncho's poetry collection when it hits the physical world on (TBD) and maybe follow him on twitter or lurk from afar or something. It's damn good poetry and not 'shitty' or 'trying to hard' or anything. I see good things for this man.

check out his website too.

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

mood, projection and perception or i'm not suitable for existence today

open door, walk in
fucking shaking
shaky; can barely think,
so awkward
she's coming over

logical brain:
look her in the eyes

stop shaking
look down
fuck! stop fidgeting
she's waiting, expectantly

logical brain:

look her in the eyes

play with hair

look down at feet
look around room
she's staring at you

logical brain:

look her in the eyes

make eye contact

"Can I get the portobello on focaccia?"


stop being so awkward
take out wallet
hand her money

logical brain:

fill silence

"So did you have a good holiday?"

don't start conversation with her

"Oh cool, you're from Michigan? What do you miss most, the cold or the people? heh"

what am i doing?

"Oh sailing, didn't know it was big out there. heh. Like, what, on the Great Lakes or something? ha ha"


"Oh no way, cool, I guess that makes sense since those lakes seem so big. Well guess you can still do that here with all that water that surrounds us! ha ha"

just walk away
stop shaking

"Okay, well have a good day"

yes go now never look back


fucking shaking
sit and write this down
what is wrong today

Sunday, January 9, 2011

Q+A with Megan Boyle, Tao Lin

I participated in a group gchat with other interested peoples to grill the shit out of Tao and Megan with questions. It was fun.

Full script available at Evan Hatch's blog.
Such blogworthy things as Megan and Tao's marriage were revealed.
This doesn't make me any more relevant, no worries. 
I was elated to have such direct access to one of my favorite contemporary authors. It was cool.


steely/taddonio christmas celebration

every year for christmas we play bingo. winners test fate by scratching lottery tickets. it's a lot of fun. this year we somehow went into an impromptu singing session revolving around the bingo slots called...

straight singing

Saturday, January 8, 2011

salty goodness falls from your eyes, i'm envious

i can't remember the last time i cried
which is weird because i identify with people and the human condition
generally, all around, i'm an empathatic dude
so then, why am i incapable of tears?
the moments come when you least expect it
you feel it coming
sneaking up
grabbing a hold of your face
contorting it
squeezing it at the eyes
on the verge of an orgasm
or like, about to sneeze
and just as that tensions builds up
it is released
and you sob and you cry and you feel so good afterwards
but i can't make it over the hump
i can't let it out
i want to let it out
scream and cry
in a hot destroyed mess
showering my face, my body, the earth
in a salty river
fuck i want to cry so bad
sometimes when cheesy commercials or things crafted to elicit an emotional response come on i think
"this is fucking stupid"
but then other times in the middle of a joyous moment in a movie
i'll feel the twinge, the pulling on my cheeks, the tenseness in my face
to see humanity in an unrealistic moment of goodness
acts of human goodness make me want to cry
but still, i can't cry

i want to cry

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

a rant

arianna huffington on sleep deprivation awareness

Speaking from the perspective of a 25 year-old male, I agree that people use sleep deprivation as a bragging point quite often, especially when alcohol is involved. Men and women. A lot of times my own 'pride' is challenged, like,"come on, just come out for a few hours, I got four hours of sleep last night after getting blasted, and i worked all day today and i'm still going out." I'm not offended by it at the least, but I am aware of it when it happens.

And i've experienced it from both men and women, and they are equally malicious in their attempt to call into question my masculinity 'simply' because I would like a solid night of sleep.
I don't have a problem with Arianna using an anecdote to spread awareness about sleep deprivation. Actually, cool.

I take issue with this:
"[U]nfortunately, for men sleep deprivation has become a virility symbol."
For Arianna Huffington to turn this into a polarizing man vs woman issue is reprehensible and irresponsible. There is absolutely no correlation between sleep deprivation and men specifically. As human beings I see research supporting a person being less productive, less inspired, and less joyful with sleep deprivation but I see nothing showing that men actively seek out less sleep then lord it over women as proof of their masculinity. Why turn something into a gender battle when we are speaking of humans in general? This shouldn't have to be, and is not a gender issue.

How many women would be offended if we flipped this around and said "I have a feeling that if the Lehman Sisters were Lehman Sisters and Brothers they might still be around. While all the other sisters were busy being hyper-connected 24/7 maybe a brother would have noticed the iceberg because he would have woken up from a 7.5 or 8 hour sleep have and been able to see the big picture." [hypothetically, bare with the example].

I do regret that there were not women involved in the corporate heads of the company (or I assume there wasn't based on what Arianna is saying, if there were, then forgive my ignorance). So, what does this statement imply? She assumes that by having a woman there [at Lehman Bros.] it would necessarily follow that she was also getting enough sleep, and therefore would also have saved the company. Getting enough sleep, as she illustrated herself, is not an inherent quality of a woman! Faulty logic. It does not follow that because you are a woman, you get enough sleep. I would whistle-blow on a man making the same claims about women and accuse him of misogyny, it just isn't right!


Forgive my rant. It is my attempt to draw some attention to the latent misandry embedded in her lecture.